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Joke Thread
Last post 05-04-2008, 4:27 PM by Paladin. 95 replies.
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 01-05-2008, 8:52 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
Just think -
if the Indians had given the Pilgrim fathers a donkey instead of a turkey, we all would be having a piece of ass for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-05-2008, 8:59 PM |
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Re: The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
 Paladin wrote:
Just think -
if the Indians had given the Pilgrim fathers a donkey instead of a turkey, we all would be having a piece of ass for Thanksgiving and Christmas.
HA HA HA..and whats on your mind tonight..hmmmmmmm thanksgiving was a few months ago!!!!!!!!!!
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| 01-05-2008, 9:03 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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Re: The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
geeez , you have to ASK ????
![Embarrassed [:$]](/emoticons/emotion-10.gif)
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-05-2008, 9:06 PM |
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Re: The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
hee hee...just thought I would give you a hard time...oops!
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| 01-05-2008, 9:09 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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Re: The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
Starry wrote: hee hee...just thought I would give you a hard time...oops!
![Wall [wall]](/emoticons/wallbash_red.gif) ...............![Stick out tongue [:P]](/emoticons/emotion-4.gif)
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-05-2008, 9:12 PM |
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Re: The Thanksgiving & Christmas Donkey...
Paladin wrote: Starry wrote: hee hee...just thought I would give you a hard time...oops!
...............
hey slow down...your gonna wear yourself out!!!
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| 01-05-2008, 9:12 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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Ahhhhh...a cold shower helps
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-05-2008, 9:18 PM |
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| 01-05-2008, 9:28 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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and people wonder why I am soooooo mean....lol
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-24-2008, 9:20 AM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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This applies to American's but it is still cute.. A mother is driving a little girl to her friend's house for a play date.
"Mommy," the little girl asks, "how old are you?"
"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother replied. "It's not polite."
"OK", the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"
"Now really," the mother says, "those are personal questions and are really none of your business."
Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?"
"That is enough questions, young lady, honestly!"
The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.
"My Mom won't tell me anything about her," the little girl says to her friend.
"Well," says the friend, "all you need to do is look at her drivers license. It is like a report card, it has everything on it."
Later that night the little girl says to her
mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."
The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?
"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."
The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
"How in heaven's name did you find that out?"
"And," the little girl says triumphantly,"I know why you and daddy got a divorce."
"Oh really?" the mother asks. "Why?"
"Because you got an F in sex "
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-25-2008, 7:34 PM |
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Re: A little girls questions
Hey, I've got one.
Two baby seals walk into a club.
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| 01-25-2008, 7:38 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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Re: A little girls questions
Cloudhopper wrote:
Hey, I've got one.
Two baby seals walk into a club.
and....and......?
dang,,,it ( pardon the pun ) just hit me....
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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| 01-25-2008, 7:42 PM |
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Re: A little girls questions
Cloudhopper wrote:
Hey, I've got one.
Two baby seals walk into a club.
Geez and to think I always thought you were such a gentle soul!!
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| 03-17-2008, 8:56 PM |
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Paladin
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Monk in Celibacy training
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Posts 6,250
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And God created Cat, and saw that it was good.
A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to "Where do pets come from?"
Adam and Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us."
And God said, I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regard less of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves."
And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.
And it was a good animal.
And God was pleased.
And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail.
And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I can not think of a name for this new animal."
And God said, " I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG."
And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.
And they were comforted.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was content and wagged his tail.
After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well."
And God said , I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration."
And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.
And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.
And Adam and Eve learned humility.
And they were greatly improved.
And God was pleased
And Dog was happy.
And Cat didn't give a sh*t one way or the other.
Keeping you informed, entertained and amused.. Moncton.net archives-http://www.moncton.net/canadian%2Ddiscussions/ Moncton.net Chat-http://www.moncton.net/e/chat.aspx "The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." - Albert Einstein -
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